Representation Through Humiliation

2/02/2005

Odds on the State of the Union

A break from hiatus to comment on the most overated event in the history of America, the time of the year when millions of americans sit down in front of the TV and listen to their President tell them things they should have already noticed. That's right: it's the State of the Union. and Pandagon' posted some odds on the strange events that may or may not be occuring tonight:

Over/under on standing ovations (partial or full): 98.
O/U on GOP-only standing ovations: 11.
O/U on uses of the phrase "personal accounts": 13.
O/U on "private accounts": 2, both slips.
O/U on "freedom": 23.
O/U on "liberty": 18.
O/U on number of times camera shows Bill Frist picking his teeth with a scalpel: 1.
O/U on number of times the Fox post-speech show mentions something Hillary did: 24.
O/U on number of times Bush mentions the phrase "spending freeze": 5.
O/U on number of times someone stands up and yells "Bullshit!": 0.
O/U on number of times someone should: 196.5.